I Have To Admit, I Was Being Judgmental

My first book was released on Tuesday, five days ago. For days leading up to the book release, I felt on edge, and I couldn’t quite figure out why. Rather than just being excited about the upcoming release of my first book, I felt anxious and weary. I had prayed about the feeling a few times, but it just seemed to linger. Sometimes that happens with insights from God, they seem to take time.

There are times when I pray about something going on in my life and the insight comes immediately. Sometimes I don’t even have to pray. I just watch my reaction to something and immediately see the pattern. For example, the other night it was freezing cold here in Minnesota and my husband and I were dealing with a technical problem with a motorcycle that was outside in a trailer. We were cold, he was getting frustrated, and I watched myself become upset and not only try to fix the problem, but also his feelings.

I immediately knew it was a Daddy issue with barely a prayer. The insight just dropped in. I could see that my reaction to him was coming from little girl Lisa being upset that her Dad was upset that a bike part wasn’t fitting a certain way or had broken. I was a competitive road bike racer as a kid, and I spent a lot of time with my Dad and the bikes. The little frustration that Kevin had experienced about the motorcycle had reminded me of my Dad and I reacted. Within minutes, I had prayed about the situation with Kevin and the old stuff with my Dad, and I came back to peace.

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